If they're still around when they're that awful, they must be difficult to get rid of.

[Of course they are, they can turn their enemies into living furniture.]

I don't yet trust in my own abilities to play the players as it were, but I'm sure there are those out there who would enjoy weaving webs for the weavers.

But I'm not sure I'd call us for ding-dong ditch either, unless by "ditch" you mean "a curbstomp that didn't make it all the way to the curb". But the equivalent of flaming bags of dog poop on the porch may also be an option.