[video]

[greyaria]

[Emily isn't wearing the ugly blue jumpsuit. She is instead wearing ugly blue scrubs, and judging by the background, she's in the Infirmary. And she's smiling. Emily is always. Smiling.]

Is there anyone out there with an injury or chronic medical condition that was untreatable in your home universe? I have robotics lab and medical access now. Come on by and we'll see about sorting that out! Or just come by for a checkup! I don't discriminate!

[She should probably set expectations properly, huh? Her good cheer goes from disconcerting to almost normal as she adds her caveat.]

The equipment is, hmm, vintage and I don't promise I can fix everything, especially if your biochemistry is out there compared to humans, but it seems like I'm from the future [she makes wiggly finger gestures, which are apparently supposed to signal...something] relative to quite a few of you, so that's an extra few centuries of medical knowledge. Might as well put it to good use!

Comments

[greyerrant]

I could probably use a good looking over. You're a medicae, then? I have some, ah, unusual attributes vis a vis a standard human, but having someone who can knit flesh and stabilize me if I'm shot or need replacement parts is excellent.

[ He doesn't appear offput by the finger wiggles, but instead thinks to ask ]

I am from the 31st Millenium. When are you from?

[greyaria]

Medica, there's only one of me!

[Latin joke! She keeps going without giving Loken a chance to respond.]

It sounds like you're operating on Commissar Cain's calendar. 3rd millennium here. Mid-26th century, for people nearer to me.

[Emily's pretty polite when she's not busy being tactless and tends to refer to people by titles if they have one. She's also glancing at the anatomical landmarks visible on Loken through his jumpsuit and the screen miniaturization.]

[greyerrant]

That is correct, although he is more... temporally advanced than I am.

[ His brows knit when she says there's only one of her, and asks. ] Am I given to understand you are our only medical technician? This is not to insult your skill, but rather, I am worried we may not have enough people dealing with a large casualty event.

[greyaria]

[Well, she's the only one who's any good besides that one nurse who isn't actually a nurse, but even Emily's not tactless enough to say that out loud.]

There are a handful of MDs. It's just that medicae is the nominative plural!

[Sigh. Jokes aren't funny when you have to explain them.]

video

[googledox]

Though externally I resemble many other humanoid species like humans, my physiology and biochemistry differ significantly in some respects. I would like someone to examine me for a baseline and to perhaps familiarize themselves with my physiology before any injuries.

[His nostrils flare slightly.]

I've been to the Infirmary to inspect their facilities and see if volunteering as a medic is a possible way to make myself useful - seeing as I've apparently garnered a lifetime ban from the labs. I wasn't particularly impressed by their leechcraft.

[He briefly raises his eyebrows for emphasis.]

I would vastly prefer to have a physician or medic from a time period with similar technological advancement to my own.

[greyerrant]

A joke. I see. [ He tries to smile. It's clear he hasn't done it in a while as his scars move around on his face. ]

I'm sorry. I used to be more inclined to joke. When would you be free to examine me?

[greyaria]

It's certainly going to be challenging. I can't even flash-clone organs! Unless I build the flash-cloning rig myself, and that will take months. Years if I have to reproduce quantum computing to get the rapid DNA sequencing right.

[She huffs in exasperation.]

[greyaria]

[Emily appreciates the effort, anyway, and smiles back. It turns out her war trauma made her really good at it.]

Now? I might get called away for surgery, but that's always going to be true. Most days people manage not to fall into the turbines or impale themselves while assembling office furniture.

[takenalive]

What kind of technology do you have for visualizing internal organs?

[greyerrant]

I shall be right over then. [ And so he shall, the sounds of his heavy tread proceeding him as he heads into the Infirmary, ducking his head a bit so he doesn't brain himself on the doorway. ]

[shipoftheseus]

[ hi have a rock ]

Do you have paste?

[greyaria]

[Emily's kinda space racist, but she's also a professional, and so manages to keep it in check.

Also, she not-quite-answers the question by waggling her hand in a "so-so" gesture and looking dubious. She doesn't like the scanners.]

[greyaria]

Paste? I have various surgical adhesives.

[You're very. Sparkly.]

[googledox]

In my brief time breaking into the lab facilities, it was abundantly obvious that their technology is pitifully underdeveloped. That's what foiled my entire plan.

I managed to get in but the technology was so inadequate there was no way I could build what I needed to disrupt the internal shock devices before apprehension. I would've had to reinvent several technologies from the ground up.

[He breathes in a deep breath and lets it out in a sigh.]

They don't have quantum computing. They have digital computers. That use binary.

[He rolls his eyes.]

Glorified abacuses.

[takenalive]

I see. It's a gland on the inside of my skull, so I'm sure you understand my reluctance to have it manually examined.

But it's probably worth setting up the protocol for if it becomes inflamed again. There are better ways to address that, but if you have someone who can get through bone and use a small enough blade, all will be well.

[action]

[greyaria]

Captain Loken! Hello!

[Emily is very perky and also reads other people's network threads.]

We're not scaled for you, I'm afraid. I have a work order in to modify one of the beds, but I expect that will go through sometime around when the sun enters its red giant phase.

[Or when she takes things into her own hands with a welding torch.]

[video]

[aleifr]

[Aleifr's response boils down to one word:]

Biochemistry?

Re: [action]

[greyerrant]

I see. Will I need to lie down or will an examination while standing be sufficient? [ He looks at the floor placidly, obviously not worried about the idea of lying on it if she needs him to ]

[greyaria]

People are going to die because of this.

[This is as close as Emily gets to seriousness.]

I'm a very, very good doctor, but there's only so much I can do with these tools.

[greyaria]

Oh, it's good enough for that, but you might have trouble fitting in the scanner.

[Emily squints at his very-not-human anatomy.]

If this feisty little gland of yours does become a problem, I'm a very good neurosurgeon!

[And the chance she succumbs to the urge to do a dissection is vanishingly small.]

[greyaria]

The things that make up your body that are too small to see, and how all the little itty bitty pieces talk to each other!

[For once, she's not being condescending, that's just how she talks when she doesn't have to be precise for science reasons.]

[greyaria]

That depends what you're here for and just how many aftermarket parts they stuffed into that chassis of yours.

[Emily waggles a finger at him, and is not flirting. Probably. It's hard to tell with her.]

[aleifr]

"The little things that make up my body."

[He's no less confused.]

[takenalive]

[He has to type because the device won't pick up thought-speech and he's had the impression it would be unsettling to talk to someone directly if it's not an emergency.]

It's one of those noisy little tunnels, isn't it?

Glad to hear it. If it becomes a problem and goes unaddressed, I'm most likely the only fatality, but quite a lot of people would be incapacitated for some days.

[googledox]

I may be able to make some...adjustments. I'm not allowed in the labs but they said with "good behavior" I might assist in providing medical care. Perhaps I can garner enough good will that they'll let me improve the medical equipment, if nothing else.

[He tilts his head.]

In the meantime, it might increase everyone's chances to have more qualified healthcare practitioners volunteer there.

Coluan schooling is significantly more intensive than that of many other species due to our intellects. We gain the full expertise of multiple scientific disciplines - including medicine - and then choose to specialize further in several.

While I opted to specialize in mechanical engineering and physics, I did obtain the full scholastic body of knowledge equivalent to a human medical degree - enough that if I'd moved onto practical training and a residency, I could've become licensed. And I have on occasion provided care for my multi-species teammates on a higher level than first aid.

But I still lack much practical knowledge of procedure. Holographic simulations are not the same as practice in the field. There are far more variables and there is sometimes far more complex trauma.

[A pause.]

Also it's a very different experience setting bones when you're not ten. Learning skills like patient intubation is far easier when you don't have to use a step stool.

Would you perhaps be willing to help train me on a practicum? Like a residency? Then at least during any mass casualty incidents, if I'm still standing, you won't be the only qualified doctor. My education's emphasis on xenobiology and adaptational medicine might be especially useful if I can properly learn procedure.