piper90 | 001: Group Introductions

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001: Group Introductions - TEXT

[During a lull in the party, Armstrong taps out a quick message to the network. Not that private one, he doesn't trust it. They can answer whenever they like, so long as he gets an answer. The trick would be wording it.]

So, we're all in this for now. You've had your welcome cake, but you can't meet everyone in a party, no matter how hard you try. But, since we've all been encouraged to sign up with Jorgmund, I figured now would be a good time to get some introductions done. Talk about any specialties we might have.

Share information that we feel comfortable sharing. This isn't to pressure anyone or to force out any dark secrets.

[Not where watchful eyes can see, at least.]

Besides, I prefer doing this to making a cute information sharing game.

So, please, make your own threads within this post to keep everything organized.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Encouraged", that's a neat way to say kidnapped and tortured, I'll have to remember that one. [Yeah, that probably was just a way to keep any Jorgmund snoops from breathing down their necks, but Jack for his part is well past insincere niceties, even if they're probably to everyone's benefit.]

I'm Jack Spicer, your resident Evil Boy Genius, and future ruler of the world. My world. This one can finish biting it for all I care. Preferably when I’m no longer on it.

I specialize in robotics, advanced AI systems, and more general programming, as well as mechanical engineering, and designing and creating various kinds of vehicles. But I like to think of that last one as more of a useful hobby. [Just going to leave out the use of practical applications of quantum mechanics for now. He's all for a good brag, but he’d prefer not risking the chance of being forced to hand over the keys to controlling time and space to an evil organization he wasn’t running.]

But I guess that probably all pales in comparison to the literal 12th level Brainiac [Nice codename superhero. Real imaginative.] so I’ll just add infiltration and knowledge of a certain collection of magical items to the list of my better qualities.

Which reminds me, to whatever Jorgmund stooge is probably reading this; my Monkey Staff better not end up under glass in that oddities museum you’ve got going!

Edited 2020-04-21 23:42 (UTC)

You build vehicles? I build vehicles. Mostly planes. Sometimes ground vehicles. I've built a couple of submarines too.

[Someone read all that and wanted to talk shop instead of jumping his shit over being a villain out for world domination?...Weird. Kind of the last thing he expected from what felt like a group of mostly heroes, but hey, if this person could roll with that, he supposed he could roll with them.]

oh, yeah? i tend to lean more toward jets then planes (unless you were rolling those together) but otherwise, same here.

like, full-sized submarines? or submersibles?

[Of coarse, he might not have read Gadgets into, he's kinda been skimming through a lot of this. So he's yet to realize she's a mouse.]

[They're stuck in this together, he's not currently doing anything evil, and it's not the first time she's talked shop with a villain. She can gloss over it for now. Unless he actually does something evil, in which case she'll come down on him like a sack of bricks. Possibly with a machine that tosses sacks of bricks.]

Jet engines are a little difficult at my size. Especially with the materials I usually work with. I did build a rocket capable of reaching orbit out of a trashcan once.

And one submarine, two submersibles. They were full-sized by my standards, but they probably wouldn't be full-sized by your standards.

Edited 2020-04-22 02:46 (UTC)

[Yeah, they are kind of treading on neutral ground here, so it probably won't come to that. For the moment, if he did come up with any "evil plots" they would likely be aimed at their mutual enemy.]

Wait...what?

[The size thing manages to throw him a bit, even more than the idea of building a rocket out of a trash can. Enough that he actually bothers to go click on her intro video to see if there's some context for that. And boy is there ever!]

holy shit, you're a mouse.

[Like she didn't already know that.]

okay, probably a weird question here, but are all animals in your universe sapient? just you and your buddies? or is this a 'flowers for algernon' situation?

The first one, but humans normally can't understand us. I've run into a couple of exceptions once or twice, but for the most part you guys have no idea what we're saying.

well, that's a horrifying combination.

[Now he really hopes that's not the case in his universe.]

here's to hoping your universe has more vegans than not.

[Oh goodness he's so edgy. And teens are not Bunny's target audience. How to tread here?]

At least a few of you have heads for machines. Glad I don't have to pay attention to that.

What's the deal with your monkey staff? Magic weapon, ancient artifact?

Edited 2020-04-22 11:51 (UTC)

[Isn't this the giant rabbit guy? Scratch that- the Easter Bunny!! Even just skimming over things in the forum that was a hard one to miss. Also, the same guy who basically offered himself up as a sacrifice on the totally not a trap secret message board. Looks like he's got a bit of edge to him, too. For a living fairy tale.]

it's both.

[And that's all he's sharing about it here. Let the suits have its name, and test it out if they were feeling brave. Maybe a few of them would go full monkey. That should be fun for them.]

part of that collection of magical items i was talking about. they got three others like it on display in their "collections" room.

[And they apparently only knew what two of them did. Let's just see if they take the bait on asking how the other one worked.]

not sure how they got ahold of those, they sure weren't brought over here with me.

[And that's a bit worrying honestly. He's been trying not to think into it too hard.]

[He recognizes the reticence, and it's smart. Best not to brag about the full capabilities where Jorgmund can see.]

Three others of the same sort of monkey staff, or three different items from the same group of artifacts?

[That's a worrying point he just made. If there are items from this kid's world that aren't his, does that mean the owners of those same objects are still being held by the company in reserve somewhere?

This is generating more and more questions that he'd rather ask the kid in person, where their speculation won't be preserved for Jorgmund to go over at leisure.]

How photographic is your memory?

The later. They all do wildly different things. All look really different, too. Unless you can tell the similarity in artistic style, it can be hard to tell they’re even from the same collection. Two of the ones they have here are kinda duds. Useful in the right situation but not very practical compared to a lot of the others.

[Techinaly all three of them fit that mold but Shadow of Fear was arguably a lot more dangerous than the other two.]

Eh, my memory’s honestly on a pretty average joe-ish level. [Possibly worse.] Why?

I'm a magical creature. I might know the artistic style. Think you could describe it good enough I could draw it?

[And maybe Jack saw something that he didn't immediately recognize as magical, while he was getting a look around.]

You. I like you.

aw, thanks.

[There's a pause as he has to stop and think through what else to say here. It's not often he runs into someone he just sort of clicks with. And it's honestly a struggle to juggle wanting to keep that approval while sating the need to appear just as aloof and above friends as she seemed to be in her own post. He could go along with not wanting friends. Friends were overrated anyway. He has associates, partners, lackeys. People he could be friendly with, sure, but there was no loyalty there and if things went sour there was an understanding that it was every man, women and incorporeal being for themselves. It was actually something of a comfort to know she likely worked along those same lines.]

i like your style, too

nice to know there's at least one like minded person on this rusty heap

hey, we can't all be the teacher's pet, can we?

[ Catra tried very hard to work along those lines, truly. It was just that she ultimately didn't want to be alone. Even if she has trouble admitting that to herself. ]

I'm sure demanding them not to do that increased the odds it will end over there in the museum.

[Time for the Monkey Staff to be exhibited like some trinket! Possibly! Sure isn't impossible, the Jorgmund rig's people seem to be flippant about them and their possessions like that]

[Okay. He can't exactly explain that that was what he was banking on without giving up his game. So instead he just glares at the message for a moment, like the person on the other end was purposely trying to make him choose between screwing himself over or looking like an idiot. Does he like the idea of his Wu being put on display like it was some quaint little cultural oddity to be gawked at? No, not particularly. But in the end, it would be a lot easier to eventually steal it back if he knew where it was vs having it locked up where ever they were currently keeping it. ]

if they know what's good for them it better not.

Edited 2020-04-29 05:12 (UTC)

They're betting on you not fighting back to get it.

Not that you should. It'd be rather stupid to do such a thing.

[Dojima would completely understand! Truly, he would! And he'd support wholeheartedly. But he's also a big fan of not doing things recklessly, most of the time]

[Again, he just glares at that message for a bit. He's definitely being called out, and it takes more self-control then it should to keep himself from texting "don't tell me what stupid reckless plans i should or shouldn't do!"

Instead, he eventually goes with-]

then it's a good thing i didn't have any plans to do that.

[Smoooooooth. If only gritted teeth could translate through text.]

[ Somewhere, deep deep in his heart, Steven's not sure if he thinks Jack sounds like the kind of person Peridot should be introduced to to make friends or kept apart from for the safety of their immediate surroundings. Sounds like a lot of pointy metal objects.

No, wait, he skimmed over something extremely noteworthy while he was admiring those qualifications. ]

Since when were you EVIL?

[Finally! Someone has a negative reaction to that! It's tacked on to disbelief, but it's a start. It's got him giddy enough to switch to video. He's apparently found a decent place to lean his tablet, leaving his hands free to be as theatrical as he wants, and his smirk is treating to break into an ear to ear smile.]

Ooh, let's see…[He starts counting the years off on his fingers making a show of muttering to himself like he's genuinely trying to pin down a date. Only to shrug, that mischievous smile winning out.] since always. surprise! i was evil the whole time, slipped it right under your radar Steven.

[For emphasis he uses his arms to depict something "slipping under the radar". He's being such a goof about this it might honestly be hard to tell whether or not he's joking. Unfortunately, he's not.]

Seriously!? How many times can this happen!? [ There's so much to unpack. On one hand, Jack didn't ping his danger radar. On the other hand, he historically doesn't always nail that anyway. Jack has the malicious glee of Aquamarine and Eyeball...

But Steven has never a) met someone who turned out fully legitimately evil, or b) met anyone who just outright said they were evil. There's usually some thinking they're right and good and going too far, or emotional damage his mom did or whatever. So that's something to add to his equation.

Yeah he can't make heads or tails of the legit levels here.

There are relationships he knows how to navigate and this theoretically is one. He's got all the scriptwork. But he's also offended and preemptively tired. Does he just have a magnet??? For this??? A sign on his back that says to turn out weirdly malicious? ]

Jack. I don't know you well enough to know if this is a prank, but if it's not? Guess who's about to make a really big blip on my disappointed radar?

[ That's the worst of all radars, in his experience. ]

Edited (that was the wrong icon thank u mobile browser) 2020-04-29 08:57 (UTC)

[Aaaand now he's laughing. Something a little too light and spontaneous to be one of his patented evil laughs, bordering on just honest enough for him to clap a hand over his mouth, smothering it down to a giggle. When he manages to pull himself together there's a touch of sympathy in his smile, but whether it's genuine or mocking is up in the air.

That...that had been a hell of a reaction. Better than he'd thought it would be. He'd half-expected more disbelief. But it's clear the guy's sick to death of having to deal with people like him pulling this kind of garbage on him. How many times has this happened to you Steven?

There's a familiarity to that frustration, though. Feels good. Feels like home.]

Ah, relax. I'm not out to make myself your problem, Space Boy. Cross my shriveled little black heart. [Aw, look at that, he actually swipes an X over his chest and everything. Totally an honest gesture.] We're all in corporate hell together and all that. For the time being, I'm basically Switzerland.

And I appreciate that. [ Steven doesn't have to know anything about Swiss neutrality to get the vibe Jack is putting down, which is good, because he doesn't know pretty much anything about it.

This is something to not forget, not necessarily in a grudge-holding manner. Evil but not planning on doing evil stuff in corporate hell is the weirdest status ever.

He's keeping this one on his list of people, places, and things to be concerned about. Exactly what level it hits and what approach it gets to be determined at a future date. ]

But why specifically decide to be evil in the first place when you know it's evil?

[ Confused woman staring at math meme dot png. ]

[All the humor suddenly vanishes from Jack’s expression when he’s asked to explain why he’s evil, and he lets out a scandalized gasp.]

Steven!

[He’s “can’t believe that came out of your mouth” levels of aghast, putting a hand to his chest and everything. Like Steven had just broken some unspoken taboo.]

You don't just ask a guy why he's evil!

[And just as quickly as it disappeared that mischievous smile is back, tugging at the edge of his mouth, bringing with it a touch of dry humor to his tone.]

Especially not on a public forum run by kidnappers that could use that information against said evildoer. I mean...come on, man. Seriously.

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